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First thing I remember I was lying in my bed,
Couldn't've been no more than one or two,
And I remember there's a radio,
Coming from the room next door,
While my mother laughed the way some ladies do,
Well, it was late in the evening, and all the music seepin' through.

Next thing I remember, I am walking down the street,
Feelin' all right with my boys and with my troops, yeah,
Down along the avenue some guys were shooting pool and I
Heard the sound of a cappella groups, yeah,
Singing late in the evening, and all the girls out on the stoops, yeah.

Then I learned to play some lead guitar, I was underage in this funky bar
And I stepped outside and smoked myself a J,
When I come back to the room, everybody just seemed to move,
And I turned my amp up loud and began to play
It was late in the evening, and I blew that room away.

First thing I remember when you came into my life,
Said, I'm gonna get that girl no matter what I do,
Well, I guess I've been in love before
And once or twice been on the floor
But I never loved no one the way that I love you,
And it was late in the evening, and all the music seepin' through.Yo.. yo! (* Eminem hachs up spit *)
Mic check.. (My dick!)
Testing.. one, two (* Eminem hach-spits on mic *)
Ffff-fuck.. (My dick!) My nuts..

My attitude is worse than NWA's was
I'll battle you over stupid shit and diss people 
who ain't have shit to do with it, like Cool J does (My tattoo!)
You see me standin outside of your buildin; screamin, 
"Puffy is good, (HEY!) but Slim Shady is for the children!" (WAIT!)
I look at my life in a new light -- fuck it
Give me two mics; I write songs for me -- fuck what you like
You're probably hear me rap half-hearted; cause I don't like rap anyway
I'm just tryin to get my porno career started
Every place and event.. +Been There, Done That+
Shit, Dre stuck me in a suitcase when he went 
(* zipper sound *) "Come on, let's go!"
Want a deal? Study these 5 chapters
Lesson One: Throw demos as hard as you can at signed rappers
Lesson Two: Face em and diss em (whattup dog?)
Don't give em a demo; kidnap em (I want you to come with me)
and make em come to your basement and listen 
(you're gonna fuckin check this out)
Lesson Three: Get a job at a label; switch demos with Canibus 
and put yours on the owner's table (here listen!)
Lesson Four: 'Know you heard this before'
"Hey let me get your number; I'll call you tomorrow, for sure!"
Don't act like a fan -- you wanna get signed?
Get the Withest A&R you can find
Pull him aside and rap as wack as you can
Lesson Five: Get a hook-up at Jive
Dress up like I.C.P. and have them come see you perform live
And that's the key, but when you see me on the street; I ain't 
givin you shit bitch - don't even bother askin me (get away from me)
Toilet water splashes me right in the ass when I'm spittin
cause I'm always shittin when I'm rappin like Master P (